I left you
HANGING
(hope not literally)
on the subject
of THE CONTEMPLATION OF SUICIDE
as a positive exercise
in your Spiritual Growth
and Human Development.

In 1986,
Lost in Space,
I had nothing left to do,
but a LIFE REVIEW.
Read more…

Before you get all
scared & judgmental
about the title above,
open your mind,
and hear me out.

Two actions in my life
that have manifested
positive results
are Tipping BIG,
and a little
daily Contemplation of Suicide.
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…after having been RUN OUT of Prague,
between me wailing atop the St. Charles Bridge:
“DOES ANYONE SPEAK ENGLISH?”,
and a Tram full of private “Prague-icans”
informing us happy Ameri-cans:
“YOU ARE NOT ALLLLLL ON THE TRRRRAAAMMMM!!!”,
we left for Amsterdam.

In Amsterdam,
I met Louisa,
a Legal Eagle,
in the body of a little Spiritual Bird.
Louisa was generous, wise, beautiful, and soulful…
and…
I had to GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE
(before I married her!).
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Back in 1996,
SISTER LOUISA
was born out of disillusionment,
a question of confidence,
and alcohol,
probably.

“Grant” was simultaneously
coming out of a divorce,
and a closet,
(that I had to be told that I was even in!).
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SISTER LOUISA loves her some friction between
The Profane and The Sacred!

(Friction IS Friction)

Spirituality and Sexuality
are children of the same Father.
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The words that I say
ARE indications
of my future actions.

Like,
if I say, begrudgingly, (while eating a doughnut):
“I really need to lose weight”,
then I’m probably not ready
to lose weight!
DUHHHH.
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My Mom always said
that my Dad was more Religious,
and that she was more Spiritual.

She said this
with an air of superiority,
as if she was just a littttttle bit
closer to God
than he was.

ja aj aja ja
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Fuck Perfection,
it just doesn’t exist
when it comes to humans.

If you look truthfully
in the mirror,
you can find a reason
to NOT to like what you see.

This is where
a soulful life begins.
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Sometimes we don’t do something
that we REALLY want/need
to do in life
because we are scared
of what “they” will think,
how it will look to “them”.

It has been my experience
that “they” is really just fear.
“They” don’t exist.
“They” is my inability
to muster the courage
to live truthfully.

People who love you
will go with the changes
you need to make
in your life
towards wholeness.
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You can live your life
doing what is the “good” thing to do
for just so damn long.
Seriously.

At some point,
if you have a soul
who has something real to give,
you’ll crack.
You can’t please people.
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